Monday, June 18, 2012

Ripped pants and button popping…

With the tittle, you are immediately thinking that I outgrew my pants, split them and popped a button...well, I didn’t, so stop laughing - seriously, you’re making me mad - I’m a little sensitive. With a physique like mine, it’s hard not to be sensitive...I’m in great shape - oval is a shape...just not the best shape for a human. Whoa, did I digress...
Today’s story is about failing, over and over again. It was one of those days, that just didn’t go right. 
I came into the office, and it went downhill from there…

I actually got stuck in traffic first and just made it in time for some webinar training.
During the training I had to leave to talk to a coworker about an appointment that was coming up in about an hour. As I sat down in his office, my suit pants pocket got caught on his chair arm. It made me bounce out of the chair awkwardly, like a cat that just sat on a cactus, while my coworker looked at me, as if to say “You’re scaring me!”
As my pocket got caught on the chair, the side seam of my pants ripped about a 6 inch tear from the middle of my pocket all the way down my thigh. Remember, I was about to head to an appointment and meet with a customer. I quickly went into action with my incredible secret sewing skills...except, I didn’t have a needle and thread with me.

I went to Publix to buy a needle and thread. 
I’m not very bright, but I knew it would be better to ask where the thread was, rather than walk through the store with this gapping hole in my pants. I asked and it the back of the store! Gimme a break!
Now I’m walking through this large grocery store with my right hand stuck to my side like a Russian soldier, but my left hand was still swinging - BTW, it’s hard to keep your balance when one arm is swinging and you look like an idiot...of course, you look rather strange with both hands stuck to your side too.
I was in a quandary, so I just walked slowly and pretended to look at items avery three feet throughout the store, as I walked. I would bet the security team had a good laugh at my antics.
Now, I didn’t really think this through. If I’m wearing the pants, and I begin sewing, won’t I stab my self in the leg. I tried and the little holes in my leg are proof that you can’t sew your pants in a car.
I then went to the restroom to fix the only got worse...the button on my pants fell off on the floor, because I was impatiently trying to get this done. I couldn't do this sewing like I planned, so the next thought…
Duct Tape!
That would do it - except I didn’t have any tape either, and then I realized that duct tape would show pretty clearly on the side of my leg as I walked into an appointment.
After all of this, my appointment called, and postponed to the following week...all those holes in my leg for nothing!
I struggle with crazy things happening to me, but I learn a lessons each time, or I try.
Lessons Learned: A list today…
  1. Sewing is a lost art.
  2. I hate office furniture.
  3. Never stick a needle in your leg - it hurts.
  4. You cannot cover up a 6” gapping hole in the side of your pants when you walk.
  5. Never wear pink basketball shorts under your suit pants...just kidding...they were orange...
Thoughts: Have you aver had this happen to you? (wait, possible way this question comes back with a yes)
This story was slightly ad-libbed to protect the innocent involved...
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  1. I can relate. When I was dating, and trying to impress, I would always spill something, trip over my own two feet, or any number of other bone-headed things. I'm sure I left an impression, just not the one I would have liked. I feel your pain as you try to hide the oops of the moment only to make it worse. Total Fail.

  2. Total fail for sure. Thanks for commenting.

  3. Thanks for sharing your story, it's a great laugh though I'm sure it didn't seem like that to you.

    Back in HS our youth pastor was on stage at a revival and his pants split as he was walking up the stairs. It was really funny! I'm sure really embarrassing for him, but I remember it to this day!

  4. Hilarious - wish you had some video - I would bet he looks back and laughs now!

  5. Yeah, laughs now. At the time I remember his face turning very red! I mean, it was a room full of teens, yeah, we didn't let it go unnoticed!


Comments always welcome...